Wallet Check: - $1,500
Week 12 gains/losses: -$ 500
Terrible news this week folks. The Schlitz was on flight 565 out of Cosovo earlier this week when the plane was hijacked. The worst part is that Schlitz was the hijacker. Having lost his pride to a group of militant bikers outside East Baton Rouge Parish, the Schlitz could apparently take no more. Rumor is he demanded the plane and was immediately restrained by a 3rd grade girl on her way to visit Grandma for the holidays. Unfortunately, the plane also had engine troubles and doom seemed inevitable. Luckily, all passengers were able to escape unscathed with the exception of Schlitz. He was locked in the bathroom in a straight jacket. My hats off to the lad, as he brought us entertaining weeks of crap, some memorable stories and proved why it takes more than a Schlitz to make the greenbacks. In fact…
It takes a freakin witch doctor from New Guinea! So guess what we got?
It’s amazing that it takes so many years of losing your shirt wagering on the “Latest Lines”, but Schlitz has hopefully taught us all that a witch doctor is the only viable solution. Though this fella from “The Guinea” will only grace us with his presence this one week, I am honored and look forward to winning the money that Schlitz so desperately wanted for us all. Apparently for sacrificial reasons, the “Doctor” has to get back to the jungle for some animal rights hearings. In any case, he seems to have absolutely zero knowledge of football and/or how good any of these teams really are head to head. Interestingly, much like the Schlitz and most people who wager on football… However, the one thing the witch doctor can provide is some voodoo magic that surely will bring the Benjamin’s home for us all. This week is one game. One lock. One toast to the Schlitz. And…
The Dawgs by 8 over Tech
I may not be one for voodoo, but for the sake of Schlitz and a much needed trip to Dubai, I will be loading the wagon one last time and riding it through Athens with the spirit of Schlitz riding shotgun! He certainly brought Good Times and I for one will forever remember the life and times of a legend in his own world. When you hear the bell ringing Saturday after the game, know that Schlitz is probably at the helm. Rest in peace old friend.