Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Double L Ranch

Wallet Check following week 3: + $1,000
week 3 earnings: $0

week 4

Good evening gents! It's time for another pocket packing week of picks. I have to apologize for last week... I don't know who saw that one coming. At least we got the push and live to squander our hard earned cash another day. That day is this Saturday and do we have some matchups that have got to make you scratch your nuts wondering what the Vegas oddmakers were thinking. As much as I'd like to place all my smokeless tobacco in one cheek again this week, I've decided to spread it around. Although, we're not going far from home for these picks... Except UGA. This week we stay in the SEC for your thrills of making the american version of a peso. Let the knowledge flow:

5 Benjamin's
UGA -7 over Arizona State
The Schlitz went big on the Dawgs last week and all we got was our money back. If you were a little disturbed by this, look on the bright side, if you had taken that same money and put it in the stock market you'd really be screwed. Therefore, I think the Schlitz deserves a round of applause just for keeping your money in a safe place! Moving on, we all know the deflated feeling AZ State went through Saturday night and frankly, we also know the deflated feeling Dawg fans went through Sunday morning when learning of the tragedy in Tempe. The good thing for the Dawgs is that their team doesn't actually suck. As for ASU, they suck tremendously. Imagine having to live with that feeling the rest of your life. UNLV? You know, it's not worth getting into. Let me just say, UGA will win this by at least 17.

4 Benjamin's
LSU -3 over Auburn
Is this a joke? no. Is it a trick? no. Is it SEC football? Absolutely. On the surface this looks like the biggest no brainer of them all. But we all know SEC football and the rivalries that dwell here. Auburn will bring all they got and LSU will waltz in that stadium, having spent the last week laughing at how pathetic Auburn looked on film. Then bam! LSU will get kicked in the mouth and the bout will be on! It ain't gonna be pretty and like I said Auburn will give them their best. Unfortunately, that ain't good enough. LSU will dominate the second half, realizing what's at stake, and win this one covering the 3 with ease in the end.

3 Benjamin's
UF -7.5 over Tennessee
I don't like the 1/2 point, but UF should run this one to a 3 touchdown domination. UT sucks. As if you all don't know the facts here, let's ponder: UCLA beats UT, UCLA gets slaughtered by BYU. All the while UT slashes Bama Birmingham, ooohhh. Forget it, UT is going to get it handed to them by Tebow and that goofy ass dog will be pissin himself by halftime. Sorry, but UT is looking at a 5 loss season if they're lucky.

2 Benjamin's
Vanderbilt +6.5 against Ole Miss
The school of hot chicks vs. the school of little.... Anyway, the "little d's" can play some football this year folks. Make no mistake, Vandy will upset either UGA, Florida, or Auburn this year. You heard it from the Schlitz. Vandy beat a better than credited SC team and has the opportunity to make some noise in the SEC with a victory this weekend. Ole Miss almost beat Wake Forest, but WF pretty much sucks, so no credit given.

1 Benjamin
Arkansas will beat Bama straight up
Bama is looking ahead. I can feel that damn elephants beedy eyes as I sit here. They will absolutely forget they even have a game this weekend and by the time they figure it out... Too late. Arkansas with a shocker! Don't think that means that Bama won't play UGA like it's the national championship though. They just can't figure out how to put it together week in week out.

There you have it. We all have a great weekend of football to watch so be sure to tell the Mrs. of the house to take the kids and scurry off to the mall for about 9 hours. See you next week!



JJ said...

Schlitz has officially flown off the reservation with that Arkansas pick. Back with my Magic 5 (6-3-1 on the year) later this evening.

Schlitz said...

I wish I had come up with, "flown off the reservation". Still crackin up on that!

I didn't earn the name Schlitz for no reason... Watch them there Hogs!

Anonymous said...

5 Benjamins

Florida could beat Tennessee 3-2 and they would still jump UGA in the polls.

I'm taking out a hit on Hal Mumme.

Bop said...

Troy +21.5 vs Ohio State

All day long...ship it.

Schlitz said...


rumor has it that you think Ohio State is a less than stellar ball club? Care to elaborate???

JJ said...

JJ's Magic 5 for the week:

1) East Carolina -7.5 at NC State: If ECU doesn't cover this, they are officially a fluke.

2) Fresno State -7 at Toledo: If Fresno can beat Rutgers on the road by 2 TDs, this one will not be a problem.

3) Maryland -21 vs Eastern Michigan: EMU is in contention for the worst team in D1-A.

4) Ball State +3 at Indiana: Ball State probably wins this outright, but take the gift FG.

5) Alabama -9.5 at Arkansas: Time to riverside ole' Schlitzy.

duvydawg said...

Screw the college game picks this week. The real money can be made in the NFL. What? Did I say NFL, the league of pairity where you can't consistently win betting the point spread? You got it.

This week take the Falcons -6 over the crappy Chiefs. Have you seen who is playing QB for the Chiefs this week? Tyler Thigpen who played at the school next door to the old Quail Creek Golf Course in lovely Myrtle Beach, SC. Yep, he played at Coastal Carolina. 'Nuff Said. Even the Falcons can't screw this up.

Bear said...

Bulldawg fans across the country are cursing your name for putting the kiss of death on them in Tempe, including me. Thanks a lot Schlitz.

Schlitz said...

You should seek your faith in the Good Lord, rather than resorting to witchcraft, sorcery and superstition... You putz.

Bop said...

Well Shlitz...that was a good day.