Thursday, September 4, 2008

Double L Ranch

Week 2:

I have to begin by apologizing for my tardiness in this week's breakdown of the top 5. The past few days are nothing more than one giant blur, which has left me not realizing what day it actually is. In any case, after a tough week 1, The Schlitz had but one anecdote for the problems I witnessed on the field this past weekend... Take my issues straight to Vegas. This was not one of my better ideas. I was beaten and butchered by that God forsaken place. Next year however, will be a different story...

As for apologizing for my rough start, I will not. Though I cruised to victory with Mr. Pickens and the merciless Gators as predicted, I had it handed to me by Clemson, Idaho and Tennessee. Oh Tennessee... How they should be ashamed. I mean REALLY ashamed. They were pathetic. Words cannot convey my feelings towards that team. May that rot and preferably not in a place of peace... Idaho, I just had to laugh. Not that anyone really cares about this team unless you happen to bet on them, but how can a state University field such a piss poor group of athletes? I would suggest they rot as well, but it appears they have already done so. And that leaves me with Clemson... In all honesty, they probably aren't as bad a group of athletes as Idaho ("probably" being the key word). The problem is they have a coach that shouldn't be walking the sidelines in my sons YMCA league. He is awful. I've come to the conclusion that against a bad team Bowden can let his team loose and play street ball and they'll probably do OK. But heaven help them if they are going up against a team with a pulse that may actually require some decent coaching. Unreal. Therefore, into the fiery depths with 'em!

The Schlitz learned a lot in Week 1 and unfortunately it cost me about $300 while going 2-3. This week however, seems to bare more fruit for the Schlitz at first glance. Let's get it started:

10 Benjamin's
UGA will cover the first half line of 12 against The Chipowacahee's

5 Benjamin's
Texas will beat UTEP by 26.5
UTEP is coming off a hard fought game against the powerhouse that is Buffalo... That's right Buffalo. Not The Buffaloes, but Buffalo. What the F! They got it handed to 'em in a big way. One might suggest they were looking ahead? Whatever, the only place they were looking was straight up their cornhole. They are in for a brutal time with the Longhorns who have little since of decency and sportsmanship, and will relish in the opportunity to blow the doors off the Buffalo. Look for a slaughter.

4 Benjamin's
West Virginia will dominate ECU by 8
I hate WVU, but make no mistake, they are a far better team then East Carolina. I always like betting the second week of the season for games like this. Some team pulls off a miracle and then they want a freakin cookie. ECU, still sucks. Beating V Tech was impressive, but more in the sense that VT sucks that bad then that ECU is that good. Reality will set in this week for ECU.
It should be noted: If ECU were to win, somehow, someway, don't be surprised to see them hollering for a place at the table come seasons end. After Saturday, they don't play another team all year... Scary.

3 Benjamin's
Tulane will not lose to Bama by 30
Alabama looked good. No doubt about it. The problem is they can play down to their opponent better then any team in America. I think the UL game last year would be a worthy mention. Sure they can come to play against the big dogs and occasionally surprise you (ie: rotting Clemson), but this could be closer then you might think. Tulane is playing for pride with their city on the brink of extinction. In their minds - this is a BIG game. In Bama's mind - where is the keg Saturday night? Bama will get it together though, certainly no upset, but no 30 pointer either.

2 Benjamin's
Central Michigan will not get beat by 24
I can hear the blood boiling. Hey, if it happens, it's worth my $200 to see UGA play that well. Especially, since it'll be that second and third team that was hardly impressive against Southern in the end. UGA will jump out quick and by the third quarter, once again, Richt will rest the starters for the upcoming outings and mercy will be dealt the Chipowacah's (or whatever the hell they call themselves). That's when your points are taken away from you late. Again, take UGA in the first half and you'll have you a "winna, winna, chicken dinna!"

1 Benjamin
Vandy tonight getting 9.5 against USC
USC sucks and they sucked last week against NCSU. I don't care what the final score was, it was a close game between two really bad teams. Vandy can play offense and will at home tonight. You may even be wise to take Vandy straight up and get the odds from the bookmakers. If you just want the single Benjamin though, take the points.

Let the discussion begin...

It will be noted that the running tab this year by following the Schlitzz betz is down $300.



JJ said...

Schlitz, am I reading correctly that you are dropping one grand on the UGA first half spread?
Have to say I love your Vandy and West Virginia picks....

Back with my week 1 picks on Friday.....

Anonymous said...

shiliz, good point about ECU, they playin CUSA and probably do not play anyone else all year long. You shoulda taken that Tennessee 1st half spread last week, you woulda had a cover on the pick 6 before halftime. May UT go 5-7 this year.

JJ said...

Make no mistake that UT will come to Athens like a bat out of hell in early October.

BayouDawg said...

I gotta say, that Tennessee game should have resulted in the firing of the great big pumpkin. Furthermore, after witnessing the Schlitz gamble at blackjack, I would hesitate on going with any of his advice. I witnessed him hit on numerous occasions when the dealer had bust cards AND he split 3's and 4's......3's and 4's!!!!!!!!!!...consistently...acting like it was the right thing to do. Oh yeah, he also argued with the pitboss on the rules of blackjack. It was quite eye opening....maybe he shouldn't be our odds maker.

Schlitz said...

Thanks Bayoudog:
After reading your enlightening post I realized that I just lost 15 seconds of my life that I'll never get back... Thanks a lot. You really should seek an anger management consultant and stay away from anything pertaining to gambling.

JJ said...

Here goes:
Northwestern -6 at Duke
Louisiana Monroe +13 vs Arkansas
Florida Atlantic -13 vs UAB
Utah -21.5 vs UNLV
Wisconsin -20.5 vs Marshall

BayouDawg said...

Schlitz - please see my picture. Thanks.

Schlitz said...

That Northwestern game should probably have been in my top 5. We will see...

JJ said...

Pretty good week, Schlitz. I doubt anybody saw the West Virginia result coming. The Dawgs played the starters well into the 4th quarter, so that ended up being an easy cover. (If the spread in Columbia is less than 12 next week, LOAD UP on UGA.)

For the record, JJ was 4-1 on the week. Northwestern couldn't get the job done.

Schlitz said...

Well for all the naysayer's, particularly Bayou, you'd be heading off to church this morning with an extra $1,300 in your pocket if you followed the Schlitzz advice. Congrats to the loyal for raking in the dough and your welcome!

Good record on the week JJ. It will be noted with the Schlitz.

BayouDawg said...

I stand corrected da man

Bop said...

Nice week Schlitz.